Now I Understand

When I was younger, talking about my future with my parents was always difficult. They would sit down with me and ask me what I wanted to major in and what I could see myself doing in the future. To be honest, it always made me uncomfortable to tell them how I truly felt about my future because it's not what they wanted to hear. I know for a fact that they were looking for an answer along the lines of a doctor or a nurse, but to their dismay, that answer never would come out my mouth. I remember always expressing to them how much I struggled with Math and Science, and that I could not live my whole life dealing with either. I told them that English was more of my subject. Unfortunately, my feelings never stuck in their heads. Whenever I said that they would always say "you can push yourself" and "you can learn to love it." I finally gave up on trying to persuade them because it was pointless- i felt like they would never understand. I concluded that they were just selfish and they just wanted to parade me around. Eventually, I gave in and I said that I would do Optometry, which was probably the worst decision I could have ever made. I only said that so that they would leave me alone about the whole thing but this actually made it worse. My dad even put up a poster of an eye in my room when I was sleeping lol. When I entered college, I told them that I could not promise them this profession because it was not truly what I wanted. They were so disappointed in me. I felt so bad; I kind of felt like I owed it to them. But I stuck to my decision and as of right now I am undecided.

After thinking hard about this issue I was having, I realized that I was wrong about their intentions. Being an Indian in America made me very pressured to think that they wanted me to be a doctor. However, the only reason they were suggesting that idea was because having a job right after college is more likely when doing medicine. They just wanted me to have an easier life; they did not want to see me struggle. I felt so bad after realizing this. I honestly felt like our Indian society was pressuring them. Most of my cousins are doctors, which in turn made me feel as though I had to be one too. So why did I go through this? Why did I think that society controlled my parents influence on me? Well, in a way it did. They wanted me to survive in society but they were not looking out for what I wanted, just what I needed. As of right now, I am still confused as to what I want to be but I realize that whatever I do I have to be the best at so that I can get a job and be successful.

You Thank God?

I wasn't really sure if I should write about this or not but I decided that it's actually something that I would like to have people's opinions on. I'm not sure how I truly feel about this topic but it seems quite controversial.

Well, I used to watch a lot of the music award shows when I was younger and I use to wonder why almost every celebrity thanks God in their speeches. I understand that a lot of people believe in the all-sustaining, all-powerful God like I do but I don't see why they would think that God is blessing them. I mean, I guess he is because their fame is rising but a lot of those people who thank God in their speeches are the same one's who curse and degrade women in their music. Now, I'm not one to judge someone's faith, which is why I was unsure about writing about this topic because it is hypocritical, but it's still a question of mine. I don't see why the same people who curse and don't even mention God in their songs think that they can proclaim to the world that they thank God for blessing them. The problem is that I really don't know who is blessing them;I don't know if God is the one helping them or if it's some other source.

James 3:10, 11 says "Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?" I know that the Bible is not a reliable source in this class but when referring to God and the issue of praising Him and cursing men with the same mouth, this verse is the first thing that pops into my head. The verse says that we can't curse men and praise God with the same mouth.

It bothers me that these celebrities think that they can do this. Most of them grew up in the church and I guess that they automatically feel like thanking God is the right thing to do. But I don't see how they feel like it's okay to degrade women and curse men in their music.

I'm not saying that I am perfect so this topic is really hard to put up. I guess I just wanted to see what the responses would be. Maybe God does for a reason- maybe God blesses them for an ultimate purpose that we can't see right now. Whatever the case may be we should still try our best to live our lives the way God would like us to, or at least a life that does not question itself.

The Average Hypocritical Christian

Being brought up in a Seventh-day Adventist home and society, I was programed to follow certain rules- no TV on Fridays, no spending money on sabbath- stuff like that. I was brought up to keep all these rules and my parents would advise me to carry on these traditions past living in their home. Back in Maryland, all my friends were basically brought up in the same manner. But the difference with us from the other strict SDA families was that we did not necessarily follow all the rules. We went to church on Friday and Saturday but as soon as nightfall came, we partied hard. It was like Sabbath and the point of keeping the Sabbath was thrown out the window. Now, even though I thought about this while I was doing it some nights, I continued to follow the crowd. I remember one day in church, we read this bible verse that basically said that we should not be lukewarm for God- it's either we are fully with him or fully against him. And I asked myself, am I fully for him? Is me keeping the sabbath from Friday night to Saturday night defined as fully for him? I realized that I was not fully for him if this was the lifestyle I was going to keep up. It's hard. It's hard to fight temptations and the crowd. I want to be strong and follow Christ all the way, and I try to. I started to substitute partying and doing things that are not according to His will, with things like bowling or laser tag. But the problem came into play when I had to tell my friends I could not go to parties on Friday. I used to act like I was tired or my family had dinner at their house, but I finally got the courage to stand up for Christ like He stood up for me. Coming to college made me realize that I had to keep this practice up. I had to try to keep fighting temptation. I know I realized this at a young age but I pray for all those who have not felt this yet. I'm not saying that I'm right and everyone else is wrong, I guess it's all personal opinion. In college I have complete freedom- I can break the rules of my faith or stay tuned to it. I broke it a couple of times already and paid for it, but I think I'm starting to see that being hypocritical is natural. For example, I'll see many people in church praising God, but later that same day partying it up. I used to be one of them until I realized that God was worth missing a party or two. He was worth keeping my faith when many around me are not. I'm not condemning anyone because I am definitely not a saint or a perfect christian but it's just something to think about.

Keep your coins, I want change

I always come across this picture and pass it with ease because I see the positive message out of it. This man does not want anyone's charity, he wants a different life- he wants change. From the looks of it and the fact that he is holding up a cardboard sign, I am assuming that he is homeless. The question that always comes to mind is how did this particular man become homeless? I mean, I'm sure there is a logical explanation and now he realizes that he wants a different life, he does not want to beg for money anymore. But why did he wait? Why did he not change from the beginning? When he saw that his bills were not being payed or that he was too lazy to find a job, why did he not change then? Why did he wait till all that he had was gone? I never understood why people are homeless but I guess there are a lot of ways. I know I can't make one inference as to how this particular man became homeless but the only thing I keep asking myself is why does he not change now? Does he not get tired of holding that sign? Why won't he be the change? I honestly do not know the answers to these questions and it bugs me to think that people are actually homeless. I am from the Washington, D.C. area and there is this one location where all the beggars and homeless people go. In my opinion, this place should be visited by more than just community service groups but by the government. The government should try to give those who really want change jobs. We should do something about this- they, the homeless people, should do something about this. Change does not necessarily mean a big house for them, it sometimes means just a better way to live their lives. The only way this is possible is by changing themselves. If they really wanted change they should try. A characteristic of a homeless person is usually laziness. If change is something that they want, they need to stop being lazy and try getting a job or living a better life. Change is necessary for everyone but for them it's more of a plea. They are begging for a change and in my opinion they should just do it. Sometimes, it could just be a change in their attitude. If they are unwilling to change their lifestyle, their attitude could help them get by. I understand that some people just can't due to certain circumstances, but those who can should make a change- they should be the change. The man in the picture above should be his own change. He needs to drop the sign and be the change he needs.